My class had a field trip on Friday to this great place. We don’t get to go every year, but have been many times. Each year it is bigger and better. We teach a dinosaur unit and this is the culmination. They have a new whale on exhibit that feels magical to look up at, surrounded by second graders. It is an age where the questions flow as easy as the answers about who the whale was, where it lived, and how small it makes us feel:

We had an appointment at the insect lab. Some of my students couldn’t get enough of the rats.

After a morning indoors and lunch on the grass, we went to the gardens out back. The kids just ran around like they never get to do at school. This makes me smile big, just to have them run and laugh and act silly.

This area is called the “get dirty zone” where the students looked in compost bins for worms. The weather was amazing and I felt lucky to be there.

As a working parent I struggle with all types of parenting guilt. The list ranges from as simple as feeding them breakfast for dinner when I lack energy at the mid-week mark. It is my step up from fast food, but really not that much healthier. To the bigger concerns about spending enough time with them, supporting their interests, helping curb their desires, and modeling strong character. I know: even as I type the unfinished list it sounds too lofty to attain. I am not writing this to bare all, but to say that as much as these ideas assault me I am able to combat them with knowing that my family is in a good place.

My kids love their school and teachers. For Olivine, the baby girl who has spent the least amount of time at home and the most amount of time at the Child Development Center- I am endlessly thankful for people who love their jobs. She gets so much time to explore, develop, and grow in an environment I trust and believe in. This type of peace is priceless.

Then there are friends.

The kind of friends who love my kids like their own. The kind of friends I can laugh with, stay up late with, and leave mid-sentence to intervene in sibling rivalries.

And will take the older boy, while I keep the younger boy, and feed him lunch, treat him to a Dirtbags game and I don’t feel any guilt or favors owed. I know that this is how folks care for one another. Particularly busy moms.

And no I am not perfect, invincible to fears, or able to avoid all the subtle messages about how I “should” parent. There are plenty of comparisons being made in all variety of conversations now that my children are in elementary school. The conversations over breastfeeding, cloth diapers, and homemade baby food have now evolved into scouts, sports, and any number of ways in which parents can be made to feel like they don’t measure up. However, I am learning that with a little self-reflection, some journaling, a quiet evening, long talks before bed with Joe, an engaging new cookbook to read (thank you Jenny), and the fast approach of Spring Break- it is very possible to find a peace of mind in the modern world.

Russ loves the Beatles and we weren’t going to pass up a chance to celebrate his birthday.

The weather was perfect for a backyard hang out.

Paul even played a little musical chairs

sitting beside his pen pal Micah.

We ate quesadillas, strawberries,

and of course cake!

Olivine was in all sparkles. Joe lets her dress herself most mornings. Less fighting, more humor.
Do you see what she has on? Tights (she thought they were pants) with no shorts or skirt. Joe sincerely thought, by just looking, the black part was shorts. Although when I saw her later, I knew right away that she wasn’t wearing shorts. She found her sparkly sweater to match.

She always looks cute. Even with this bruise from the child care center (no worries on our end, lots of play means someone is bound to get hurt). She was happy to report she was given ice.

After the fever I had this past weekend and finishing another ten parent conferences today, I had been feeling worn down. Until I arrived home and found these:

The best part is, I didn’t order either. They are both subscription beauty boxes from my mom and Joe. Different companies and products, but similar concepts. My mom got the idea of the Glossy Box from Oprah. So double points.

Joe heard about the Birch Box from a woman. He filled out my profile and was so spot on. Triple points for him!

Those who know me, know I don’t wear make up but I like a nice lotion, hand cream, nail polish, and most of all I like MAIL. These packages were the icing on the cake for me today. A day full of good news. Earlier I found out that I did get into the Ed.D. Leadership program at CSULB and will be starting (deep breath) this June. As Joe finishes, I will go back and we have decided we have been living with less this long, might as well go for it now. The program won’t get cheaper. If all the cards line up, I will work less and Joe will work more. We will swap places for a little while. Ahhhh…never a dull moment. When these little ones go to sleep and Joe is at class looks like I have the perfect excuse for some self care, “me” time.

A birthday party the boys went to was being held at a rock climbing gym. The girls stayed home reading books, taking a bath, and having a dance party.

Henry was nervous as first but Joe said once he warmed up, he didn’t want to come down.

The only time I have been to one of these places is when I used to babysit these kids in SF. This was one of their “after-school activities” (along with attending museums, fencing, karate, and swimming). But seeing as how I am afraid of heights, it was scary then and seeing my own kids in real life, might have been too much. I know, they have harnesses.

But I am glad they all went. Sounds like lots of friends were there and everyone had fun.

They came home tired and happy. Just like I love!

He is a character in a book that Paul’s class read. He was flattened by a bulletin board and now kids make their own Stanleys and mail them to people. Paul’s project stipulated Stanley had to travel outside the state so the class could map and discuss all the places he travels within the classroom.

Of course, this is the scenario in which I reached out to a tried and true pen pal (going on fifteen or so years). She and I have written from France, Vermont, New York, and now Portland. Can I just brag on what an impressively, exceptional job she did?

She of courses wrote a letter and snapped a few pictures (the essence of what Paul needs to bring into class to share).
But she also included a book and some postcards and just made the whole project fabulous. Paul was clearly excited and now eager for class on Monday to share his treasures.

This was so fun we might need to send Stanley out on some more adventures. Check your mailbox.

in the Monday night dinner prep

keeps them busy and interested.

If you guessed tacos, you were right.

Have I told you about my friend Mimi? She is my long lost twin and honorary sister. We are learning from one another what it means to lean on and support one another in this very busy and crazy world. Luckily our boys have ended up on the same team, and although we live a couple more miles apart than we would like, we are finding strength in one another. It is an honor to watch her children because it means not only does she trust me, but they trust me. Her two boys add nothing but good to my two boys. So when she had to work yesterday, as hard as it might have been to drop them off and not hang out, she did, and the kids had such fun together- all day.

at the park

creating books

drawing

and a short video on the iPad

I wish they would pose like this for me, but they are really just sitting side by side, zoning out.

Is five kids really that different than three kids? It all feels chaotic and fun.

Wednesday night games aren’t every week, but they are the game I can make it to.

I love the long shadows as Ollie plays in the grass.

The younger siblings make up their own cheering section.

Watching my boy out on that field or up to bat makes my heart fill with pride. It is a simple pride. The surprise to look out and see a little boy who is no longer a baby, isn’t that shy, and has found a sport he is passionate about.

Not to mention watching Joe out there with the team. Another moment in which we wish his parents were here. I have so many questions for his mom. Stories I never heard about Joe and little league.

These two are seriously “happy clams” and so we have no guilt about dragging them to practice and games. Look at them. They are not being tortured. They are just happy to be where all the action is.

There will surely be a dozen more posts as we experience this very first season of Rookie Ball with Paul.

He plays every game at El Dorado Park, come by and say hello if you around.