The most recent realization of being older than I feel has come as a result of blood tests and an organ ultra sound. The results of which were emailed to me during my road trip. I learned I have liver disease and a gall stone.

What?? Who me?

No need to panic. I am vowing to currently hold off on the internet searches of webmd until my next appointment, later this week. I definitely don’t feel a youthful invincibility that I might have felt just five years ago. I am much more quick to ask “what should I do?” and “can this reverse?”The most immediate response from my doctor is to say farewell to alcohol (not the cause of my liver problems, but also not helping). I am not a drinker by many standards. But in the heat, and a work free summer, a cold beer or cider sounds lovely. The date works out well enough, my birthday has passed and the month is coming to a close.

Other changes: consistency in exercising (might need a pedometer) and less desserts/bread. This is way scarier than the alcohol. My vegetarian diet contains a decent portion of carbohydrates, that I am going to start moving away from. Don’t worry family: I will still serve you pizza, sandwiches, and pasta but I might be adding in a bit more greens with an extra helping for momma.

Before we drove directly into our old neighborhood for a burrito and some leg stretching, we wandered around Lover’s Cove (in Monterey):We let the kids get out of some of their energyand I sucked in as much of that sunshine combined with ocean and reflected sky that I could.I held hands with my little one and dug my toes in the sand.Meanwhile Paul was simultaneously elated to have found this net and heartbroken to learn we would not let him bring it in the car with us.Before crossing the bridge to our hostel in Marin
we made sure to stop in the Marina and take note of the difference between the bay and the ocean. We looked out at Angel Island and Alcatraz, as I made mental notes that these were places to visit when our kids were a tad bit older.
 Happily, we saw friends.
People usually make a place much more special feeling. In the city there are memories everywhere I look but those don’t matter as much as the chance to catch up with or just tag along like we did, and feel like we are in a home away from home. Not tourists or people passing through, but we are hanging out.We made it just in time to celebrate Dallis’ birthday
with pizza, balloon, lotto tickets, and ice cream.We stayed up late and laughed a ton.These are friends we wished would move to Los Angeles (you better at least visit more, now that you bought a Prius).In the morning, we laid under open windows exposing the crispy air of the forest.
We last minute decided the best souvenirs of the city might come from Chinatown.
A special place in Joe’s heart after working there with youth in Americorps.
So we splurged on wooden swords and a red umbrella.
We bought poppers for the walking and sesame balls for snacking.
We played in multiple parks.We tried to catch a sunset
and even asked strangers to take a family photo of the five of us.We saw Daren (which my kids voted for over my offers to take them on the trolley or the Farmer’s Market in the Ferry Building).
We drove across the new Bay Bridge while reading zines
and catching glimpses of the tearing down of the old bridge.
We visited the Exploratorium

and found an echoing tube that sounded like it came from Goggles! by Ezra Jack KeatsHey, this room looked like the Mystery Spot in Santa CruzThere was plenty to see and hear and touch, like any well made kid’s museum.My favorite pieces were these chairs and the “potty fountain”(Olivine’s name for it) which none of my kids would drink out of. It was a water fountain made from a toilet. I saw lots of funny sibling posed photos.A close runner up was this outdoor installation that was modeled after the tides and kids could climb around in it This museum is located on Pier 15, which ten years ago, looked so different. The city is endlessly changing with construction in almost every corner, and at the same time rich with history and world famous landmarks. It is familiar and yet strangely new, all at the same time.Paul wanted to see Giants stadium
(He adores sports these days).
I think these little ones saw more of the city than we thought possible.
We walked a bunch (with no stroller and no baby sack). This scene is from Lands End (out near Sutro Baths with new trails)
Of course we had burritos and falafels in the Mission,
packed up the car at the end of the week,
and headed home under the big sky of highway 5. I read aloud the last fifty pages of the Cycle of Lies book I borrowed from the library (fascinating-about Lance Armstrong).I come home from trips like this:
a. so happy to see my bed
b. fired up to plan our next adventure
c. sad we didn’t have more time (john, serena, nicole, phillip, sojourner’s’) to visit with all the people we miss
d. thankful that we have a family rhythm that includes summers and family vacations

The whole push for this road trip that transpired in less than week, was visiting my Auntie Lily. She is the younger sister (the Olivine) to my Ji’chan. She is the sibling (besides my Aunt Dorothy who has since passed away) that I am closest to.
She lives in Salinas, down the street from the high school my grandfather attended before World War II.I have been here  often enough that I  can instinctually find my way from the freeway, pass the downtown, and out among the shrinking small farm fields my Aunt’s house sits.
We had dinner together and played in her backyard.
We brought flowers and jam, picked up at a farm stand and a coffee shop. She asked about the boy’s enjoying their magazine subscription (for the last year I had no idea who was paying for it- so sneaky). She told me about her falling a couple times in the last year, I gave her my apologies for not showing up at my grandfather’s memorial (she would never ask, but definitely seemed confused). In the conversation, more than once she called him my dad, which is how I feel.
I thought for sure, procrastinating this visit, that I would burst into tears when seeing her. I regret not having seen her when she came down for the memorial from last year. She reminds me of my grandfather in a multitude of ways. However, the tears followed the visit, driving back to the hotel. While visiting, I was immensely thankful.I read books with Olivine on a blanket my grandfather’s mother made from scraps of fabric. A fifty year old blanket that looked incredible.
And to look up and see my children bonding with my aunt,
 was priceless.
We promise to return, to write more letters and make more phone calls,
maybe bring tents to sleep in the backyard.
Then headed back to the hotel. We stayed in Monterey so we could also visit the aquarium,
which is always worth the cost and the crowds and the parking.
The two special exhibits featuring  jellies and tentacles left us in awe.Plus the boys asked a dozen times to promise to let them return when they were eight and sign them up for the dive class.Oh how we love aquariums!Then we hit the road again:Just a bit further north.

I decided it was high time we stopped into this town that in Dutch is called “sunny fields.” This was one place Joe remembers visiting with his parents. His mother loved it. When I looked around, I could see her love of walking the European styled streets filled with shopping and food. It was the perfect stop in our drive.
 The kids loved the horse drawn trolley and I loved the windmills.
 This was our spot for lunch
and play
as a family,
which was followed closely by napping and enjoying of the scenic Highway One drive.  Stopping occassionally to take in the view of the beautifully diverse coastThe boys loved jumping out, taking a peek over a cliff, and jumping back in.We braked for the Elephant Seals. Paul called them “ugly, gross, and fascinating.” Henry guessed their burp like talking was because they had water stuck in their throats. We agreed their body movements looked similar to mermaids.
I will also take a quick moment to say my boys impressed me. They sat in the car for hours and just enjoyed the view. Even my baby girl. By the end of the first day, we opened the door to hotel room, she jumped on the bedand looked like this (no joke).
 

A Friday ritual. A single photo- no words-capturing a moment from the week. A simple, special, extraordinary moment. A moment I want to pause, savor and remember.

This is my new favorite:chai latte out back, at the “new to me” table and chairs (thank you, Pilar).
I am debating about painting the set red and possibly investing in an umbrella.

I am thirty-five today but I often find myself answering “thirty-something” because I honestly can’t always remember my age. I know that my height has been the same since fifteen and those fifteen extra pounds could be attributed to three babies (allotted five pounds each).

I love that I can say to my hair stylist “shorter” and wave my hands around as if they are revealing the image in my mind. Other than that, I don’t have to be more descriptive because he has learned that I am indecisive. My mom can vouch, if stuck to decide I might pass an opportunity up all together.

I hate that I catch myself judging people based on their choice of shoes. Flip-flops are everywhere and my kids love them. But are they really shoes?I am afraid of dogs, horses, and volcanoes. None of which are nearby, but I secretly worry they could be or what would happen if they were in closer proximity.

I wish I would have learned earlier in life how fun movie nights are with a projector connected to the computer.

I recently went to the chiropractor for the first time. I didn’t know those sounds could come from my bones.

I love sparkling water, especially as I discover new flavors. Jessica recently introduced me to a coconut sparkling water that I adored.

I forgot I had children with me in the West Elm store today. Luckily, there was an Ice Cream Social that my mom took them to, while I drooled over the furniture and rugs.

I use food as a way to celebrate and mourn most events in my life: big and small.

I have taken two bags to the thrift store every week this summer. I don’t know if it has made an impact on anyone in my family. But I intend on continuing to purge through our belongings.

I bought two embroidered pillows (inspired by Angela and Ben’s home) that are my motivation to now make my bed, which I haven’t faithfully done since I was seven when my mom taught me how to hide my pillow with a fold in my Strawberry Shortcake bedcover.

I plan every trip our family takes, starting with our honeymoon. I am in the midst of planning our road trip to Salinas and San Francisco next week with points of interest and vegetarian spots to eat at.

I envy people who save money to travel to exotic places. I want my children to see many places and hopefully some of that will be as a family.

I want to be better at meal planning and apologizing. If I could somehow figure out a way to make these two practices my natural response I think life would be increasingly easier.I hope I am raising children who are kind, polite, and forgiving. Lord have mercy.

A Friday ritual. A single photo – no words – capturing a moment from the week. A simple, special, extraordinary moment. A moment I want to pause, savor and remember.

The boys are both trying out ice hockey for three days-part of a free “preview” sponsored by the Mighty Ducks that my friend Mimi told me about.After tomorrow, we can sign the boys up for camp if they love it.
Henry found a teacher who adores him, so mostly he rides around on the seal.
Paul jumped right in, yesterday he hung on and found his balance, but today he was skating.It has been fun to see the difference in their personalities and in trying something new and difficult. I also love the crisp air inside the rink. Our whole family has made new discoveries about the gear, the game, and the behind the scenes to this sport.

I asked my cousin several times if any fish would be harmed in this process.He promised me that the fish would be fine.Otherwise, my little Henry agreed to eat whatever fish we caught and prepared.
I used to go fishing with my grandpa and I do remember waiting and thinking and talking.
Yesterday we spent a couple hours doing just that, down at the Belmont Veterans Memorial Pier.Although, watching junior lifeguards jump off the pier took away some of the boredom.
At another point the boys watched like  a flock of seagulls as a fisherman cleaned his fish.My cousin showed us the ropes and really he is the one who brought most of the poles and bait.In the second half of the day we went to the bayand the boys played together in the sanduntil dinner time.We walked to the Park Pantry
 and then over to Rite Aid for ice cream cones.
 Yay for time with cousins!